The spider monkey sex position is a close, missionary-style move built around entwined legs rather than any climbing or standing mechanic. One partner lies on their back while the other kneels or leans over them between their legs, and both partners wrap and cross their legs together so their bodies stay pressed close from chest to hip. The nickname comes from that clinging, wrapped-up look, not from climbing a wall or gripping with your arms. People who like face-to-face intimacy, a slower rhythm, and lots of skin contact tend to enjoy the spider monkey sex position most, and it works well for partners across a range of body types and flexibility levels.
How to Do the Spider Monkey Sex Position: Step by Step
Get settled. The receiving partner lies flat on their back with knees bent, while the other partner kneels or leans over them, positioned between their legs.
Entwine your legs. The receiving partner wraps their legs around the other partner's legs, and the partner on top lets one leg thread alongside theirs, so your lower bodies interlock.
Close the distance. Lean down until your chest is close to your partner's and your face is near theirs. Rest on your forearms or elbows rather than holding yourself far above them.
Find your angle. Small shifts in hip tilt and how high the receiving partner's knees are bent change the depth and angle. Adjust slowly until it feels right for both of you.
Move together. Once you're settled, rock or thrust in slow, small motions, since the entwined legs limit how far you can pull back. Short and steady works better than big movements here.
Check in. Because you're face to face and close together, it's easy to talk, kiss, or just watch each other's reactions, so use that closeness to stay in sync.
3 Spider Monkey Sex Position Variations to Try
Pillow-lifted spider monkey. Slide a pillow or wedge under the receiving partner's hips before you entwine your legs. It raises the angle slightly and means the receiving partner does not have to tilt their hips up on their own.
Half spider monkey. Instead of fully crossing both legs, keep one leg straight on the bed and only loop the other one around your partner's leg. It's an easier entry point if full leg-entwining feels awkward at first.
Slow-rock spider monkey. Stay entwined but shift the focus from thrusting to small, slow rocking motions with more grinding contact. It suits partners who want the closeness without much movement.
If you like the closeness that spider monkey offers, positions such as the crouching tiger or the bodyguard are also worth exploring for a different kind of intimacy.
Spider Monkey vs. Spiderman: What's the Difference
It's easy to mix up spider monkey with Spiderman since the names sound alike, but they describe two very different positions. The Spiderman position is a standing move against a wall, where the receiving partner raises one leg and the penetrating partner holds it up while both stay upright. Spider monkey is the opposite in almost every way: both partners lie down, legs are entwined rather than lifted, and there's no wall, no standing, and no need to support your partner's weight. If you like the idea of Spiderman's intensity but want something calmer and closer to the bed, the spider monkey sex position is the gentler, lying-down alternative.
Who the Spider Monkey Position Suits and Who Should Be Careful
The spider monkey sex position tends to suit people who enjoy face-to-face intimacy, don't mind a slower pace, and like a good amount of body contact. Because it relies on entwined legs rather than any climbing or holding, it doesn't require special strength or flexibility to get started.
A few things are worth paying attention to. Leaning forward for long stretches can strain your neck or shoulders if you're propped up on stiff arms, so rest on your forearms instead of your hands. Lower back strain is possible for the partner on top if their hips are angled too sharply, so keep movements small rather than arching hard. Hip or knee flexibility varies, so if fully crossing your legs feels tight or uncomfortable, use the half spider monkey variation instead. During pregnancy, the closeness and weight of this position may not be comfortable in later trimesters, so check with a doctor and consider a side-lying position instead if belly pressure becomes an issue.
Spider Monkey Sex Position Comfort and Safety Tips
A water-based lubricant helps here, since the position involves sustained closeness and slower movement, and reapplying partway through is completely normal.
Because the entwined legs limit deep, fast thrusting, a slow pace tends to come naturally in the spider monkey sex position. If anything pinches or pulls at your hips or knees, shift your leg position rather than pushing through it.
Balance matters more than it looks. The partner leaning forward should keep some weight on their own forearms or knees rather than resting entirely on their partner's body, so nobody feels crushed or loses support mid-movement.
Spider monkey does not lower the risk of pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections on its own, so barrier protection such as condoms still matters exactly as it would in any other position. If you switch between anal and vaginal contact, use a fresh condom or barrier first.
Talking About It and Consent
A short check-in before and during sex makes the spider monkey position better for both partners. A few phrases that work well:
"Want to try spider monkey?"
"Is this angle okay, or should we adjust?"
"My legs are getting tired, can we shift?"
"This feels really good, stay right there."
Because you're face to face for most of it, it's easy to read each other's expressions, but check in with words too. Agree on a simple way to say "stop" or "pause" before you start, since a leg cramp or a sore neck can show up partway through and deserves an immediate break rather than a tough-it-out attitude.
Spider Monkey Sex Position FAQ
Do you need upper body strength for spider monkey?
No. That requirement belongs more to positions like Spiderman, which involve holding a partner's leg up while standing. In the spider monkey sex position, both partners are lying down and supported by the bed, so it doesn't call for notable upper body strength.
Is spider monkey a standing position?
No. Despite the name sounding acrobatic, spider monkey is a lying-down, missionary-style position. The name refers to how the legs entwine and cling together, not to climbing, standing, or holding onto anything.
What makes the spider monkey sex position different from regular missionary?
The main difference is the legs. In regular missionary, legs are usually open or wrapped loosely, but in spider monkey, both partners actively cross and entwine their legs, which brings hips closer together and changes the angle slightly.
Is spider monkey good for beginners?
Yes. Since it doesn't require special flexibility, strength, or balance, it's an approachable position for anyone curious about trying something a little different from standard missionary.
What if my legs get uncomfortable during spider monkey?
Switch to the half spider monkey variation, where only one leg is entwined, or unwind and rest for a moment. Leg fatigue is a cue to shift, not a reason to give up on the position altogether.
