Want to shake up your routine without needing a gymnast's résumé? These five positions go from "small tweak to an old favorite" to "okay, we're really doing this." For each one you'll learn who goes where, how to make it easier and when to skip it. Laugh when it goes sideways (it will), and keep checking in with each other.
Before You Start
Some prep makes every position below work better. Have pillows nearby (they're the most underrated sex accessory there is) and keep lube within reach. Take time to warm up: arousal makes penetration more comfortable for everyone. If STIs or pregnancy are a concern, use condoms or other barriers. Put on a fresh condom whenever you switch from anal to vaginal contact. And agree before you start that either of you can say "pause" or "stop" at any point, with no explanation needed.
1. Missionary with Legs Up
How to get into it: The receiving partner lies on their back with a pillow under their hips, then lifts their knees toward their chest or rests their ankles on the penetrating partner's shoulders. The penetrating partner kneels or lies above them, holding their weight on their hands or forearms.
Who it's for: Couples who love face-to-face closeness but want a new angle. Lifting the hips often makes penetration deeper and changes where the pressure lands.
Make it easier: Rest your feet on your partner's chest instead of their shoulders, or keep your knees bent with your feet on the bed. Both put less strain on the hamstrings.
When to skip it: Choose a lower leg position if deep penetration is painful or if you have hip or lower-back trouble. Later in pregnancy, lying flat on your back can make some people dizzy, so prop up your upper body or pick a side-lying position.
2. Rider on Top
How to get into it: One partner lies on their back. The other kneels astride their hips, facing them, and lowers down. The partner on top sets the depth, pace and angle by rocking, grinding or moving up and down. If you want to try a variation, turn around to face their feet (reverse rider).
Who it's for: Anyone who wants to be in control, and anyone who finds certain angles uncomfortable and wants to steer around them. Nobody's weight presses on the belly, so many people find it comfortable during pregnancy.
Make it easier: Put your hands on your partner's chest or the headboard for balance and slide a pillow under your knees. Leaning forward lets you grind instead of bounce, which is much easier on your thighs.
When to skip it: If kneeling hurts your knees, have the lying partner sit up against the headboard and sit in their lap instead.
3. Rear Entry (Doggy Style)
How to get into it: The receiving partner goes onto their hands and knees. The penetrating partner kneels behind them, holding their hips for rhythm.
Who it's for: People who like deep stimulation and a lot of physical energy. This position also leaves a hand free for clitoral touch or a toy.
Make it easier: The receiving partner can drop onto their forearms or rest their chest on a pillow. Another option is kneeling at the edge of the bed while the other partner stands on the floor.
When to skip it: If depth hurts, the receiving partner can lie flat on their stomach, which naturally limits how deep penetration goes. Anyone with sore knees or wrists should use the edge-of-bed version. You can't see each other's faces here, so agree on a word or a tap that means "slow down."
4. Standing Against the Wall
How to get into it: In the facing version, the receiving partner leans back against a wall and lifts one leg onto a sturdy chair, a step or their partner's hip. In the facing-away version, they put their hands on the wall and bend slightly at the hips while their partner stands behind them.
Who it's for: Spontaneous moments and couples who enjoy a bit of urgency. It works best when you're close in height.
Make it easier: If there's a height difference, the shorter partner can stand on a stair step or a stable, non-slip stool. You don't need to lift your partner, and it's safer for both of you if they keep at least one foot on the ground.
When to skip it: Avoid it if you have balance problems, get lightheaded easily, are pregnant or are standing on a wet floor (shower sex is slipperier than the movies suggest). Any furniture you use should be solid enough to hold real body weight.
5. The Wheelbarrow
How to get into it: The receiving partner starts on their hands and knees at the foot of the bed or on a soft rug. The penetrating partner stands behind them and lifts their legs, holding their thighs at waist level. The receiving partner supports their upper body on straight arms or forearms.
Who it's for: Couples with strong arms, healthy backs and a sense of humor. This one is more about novelty and laughter than easy orgasms, and that's fine.
Make it easier: Try the assisted version. The receiving partner rests their chest and forearms on the edge of the bed or a stack of cushions, so only their legs are lifted. Keep it short: being head-down makes blood rush to the head quickly.
When to skip it: Skip it during pregnancy. Also skip it if either of you has wrist, shoulder, neck or back injuries, or if you've been told to avoid head-down positions (for example because of blood pressure). Agree beforehand that "put me down" means stopping right away, and lower your partner slowly, knees first.
Bringing Toys Into the Mix
Most of these positions leave room for a toy. Small vibrators fit especially well into rider on top and rear entry. A few safety basics for toys:
- Anything that goes in the anus needs a flared base. Use plenty of lube, and go slowly.
- Clean toys as the manufacturer recommends, and put a condom on any toy you share or move between body parts.
- Before using restraints, agree on limits and a safe word. Never put anything around the neck, keep restraints loose enough to check circulation, and have a quick way to release them.
If one of you feels shy about toys, start by browsing together and talking about what sounds appealing. That conversation can be half the fun.
Talk, Consent and Checking In
"Wild" works best when both of you are genuinely into it. Ask before you try something new, and check in during sex too ("More? Slower? Want to switch?"). Pain is a signal to stop or adjust, not something to push through. Bodies differ in height, flexibility, weight, disability and stamina. Adapting a position with pillows, wedges or furniture isn't cheating: it's how good sex works. None of these positions depends on gender or orientation either. Fingers, toys or a strap-on can stand in for penetration in any of them.
FAQ
Which of these positions is easiest for beginners?
Missionary with legs up and rider on top. Both feel familiar, are easy to adjust and are easy to get out of if something doesn't feel right.
What if a position just doesn't work for our bodies?
That's completely normal. Positions are starting points, not tests. Change the angle, add support or drop it and move on to the next one.
Do we have to finish in the position we start in?
No. Switching mid-way is common, and many people move into a slower, more comfortable position as they get closer to orgasm.
